Before I go to sleep, back in reality, back in my couch bed, back to my grandparents, to FAFSA, to registering for classes, to exams, studying, homework, workouts, to both of my sisters, sick...one with the flu and the other who is sick, to more arguing, bullshit, girl drama, and new york air, I just wanted to conclude my trip...
It was fun. 7/10 fun. Last time I went away it was about the same amount. A lot of shit was cool, different, interesting. The place my boy lived in was a awful, dirty and not maintained well, the people were extremely nice though, we blasted music out the ass, it was extremely hot (mind you, I had no shorts with me and I borrowed my boys long, black ones), sleeping habits were outrageous, drank a wholllllleeeeeeee lot. From the moment I stepped on campus to the end of the philly's game at 11 tonight. I'm about to fucking relapse man. My stomach feels bloated and is probably partially fucked up. I got class at 11 which means up by 8:30. I had some decent sleep in the car and on a chair/table which I set up myself. The 2nd night I slept soooo much better.NO, I did not hook up with anyone if you're wondering. Just going out from dorm to dorm, relaxing, chillen, cracking jokes, causing mayhem, and meeting a bunch of people. I played basketball too, not with the D1 bball team unfortunately. My allergies killed me saturday after I finished playing ball. I didn't get to see third eye blind which I thought was gunna be a cool experience...I guess not for us (lol). I learned a new game called baseball and KINGS and thunder and never have I ever. Friday was actually better than saturday for some reason :/.
Next, was the phillies game. Which was pretty cool. I got a philly cheesesteak, of course, and we drank beer before the game. The stadium was nice. We we're acting like ignorant new yorkers, of course and everyone was laughing but it was friendly and not violent. Mets had the lead and we were bragging until the phillies broke open in the 4th inning (Johan Santana let 5 home runs...smh). I got the METS up and coming first baseman to sign my ticket which was cool. Had some delicious icies. Then passed out like I'm going to do in a few minutes.
It was a nice, eventful trip. Made me kind of upset, missing out on that kind of experience but hey, I'm cool where I am at and there is a reason I'm there. Not sure anymore what that reason is but I like brooklyn college. It's different.
The last thing I'm gunna say is that...I'm just kind of sad. Sad for a lot of reasons BUT mainly because of my current situation with this girl. It's just been this up and down rollercoaster and it takes a toll on my physical and especially my mental. Arguing about the same old shit and hearing about the same old shit. If you're gunna do ur thing, okay, just don't say it allll the time because I don't want you to do your thing. I know you have to if I'm doing it...I guess. I'm just in a very confused and verrrryyy painful state. Everything just went from great to worse in a matter of a week or two (it was all good just a week ago- Jay-Z) and I just feel like I'm dying a little inside. Everytime I have hopes and am just letting things flow, it gets worse, awful and it strangles all the belief I have left in me that has deterioted over the last 2 years. I just picture my life with her and I feel a lot and can kind of imagine the rest and I picture a life without her and I see the difficulties and the struggle I will have to go through to get over this girl or to shove all my feelings underneath so that I don't even know they exist. Either way I'll find a way to survive and either way they'll both be bumpy. There's just sooooooooooo many obstalces that are in the way. I'm not gunna continue on because I don't want to say certain shit.
So...
Jam on it and have a goodnight rest and a great morning all readers.
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